There is now a structure that is doing something. I need to sit with it now, familiarise myself with the spaces within it, flesh out the danced areas where I don’t have enough information to feel expressive or confident and allow new detail to colour the world I’m creating and operating within. The business of remembering how to tie my tape, which direction the lever on the dimmer needs to be or steadying my finger to roll an object all require a commitment. The idea of commitment interests me a lot.
I’m tired. I don’t sleep much at night and am now beginning to feel like I’m steadily toppling to the side. My feet are cold. The process during the day is reflective, questions, findings, uncertainties, testing things, learning through repetitions are all useful. It is through practically doing that I find my way.
People are coming on Thursday. I’ll feel the pressure I know I will.